Tips for exams

Its been a really long time since I last posted I know but now that my GCSE's are basically over (I only have one more exam left which is on Friday) I am finally able to start writing on here again :) So much has happened since I last wrote on here, I have loads to tell you and lots of tips and advice I have learnt along the way which will hopefully help you all.

So where should I start?  I think GCSE's would be the best place. As you probably already know GCSE's can be very stressful but with diabetes on top of it, it can be a lot harder for us then it is for other people. There is so much revision that needs to be done, so many things to remember, so little time to do it all in. On top of this we have our levels that need to be kept under control so we can do the best that we can in the exams.

Everybody gets stressed out about exams. The only difference is when I get stressed out it can cause my levels to go high and this makes it really hard for me to concentrate. I remember sitting there trying to revise and wondering why it wasn't going into my head properly, when I checked my levels they were high and this was the reason why it wasn't going in. I would get really annoyed because it wasn't my fault this was happening but I was really worried it would mess up my exam results. I found the best way for me to revise was revising for half an hour and then having a break five minutes and then going back to revise for another half an hour. If I found my levels were running high I would give a correction or put a temp basal on to keep my levels lower so that I could actually concentrate.

If you are starting any exams or anything like that where you have got to do a lot of revision I would advice making a revision time table. On the time table it should tell you what you are going to revise everyday so that you don't get behind with revision. Making a revision time table really helped me because it meant I knew exactly what I had to do everyday and it meant I had revised everything I needed to in time for the exam. I would also recommend not leaving all your revision till the day before the exam. If you do it will just stress you out more because you wont be able to learn everything before the exam and this will mean you wont do as well as you can. I kinda left my revision for my mock exams to the last minute and I didn't do very well so for my GCSE's I made sure I revised months before the exam so that I knew all of the information and I wasn't stressing out the day before the exam.

When it came to my first exam I was so worried and stressed about it on the day, even though I had revised loads for the exam I felt like I didn't know the information properly. I remember sitting in the exam panicking as they read out the exam rules on the front of the test. I sat there and closed my eyes and focused on my breathing, this really helped me calm down. When I opened the paper and looked at the questions I realised I actually knew all the information and I was able to answer all of the questions. After the exam I felt so happy and impressed with myself because I couldn't believe that I got through the exam without panicking loads and giving up. The exam was no where near as bad as I thought it was going to be so this made me feel a little bit less stressed about the rest of my exams. Surprisingly throughout all of my exams in the first 2 weeks my levels were really good which meant I was able to concentrate properly and do the best I could.

When you do any exams remember to tell the exam people at school that you have diabetes so that they are aware as they can set up things like sitting you near the door so that you can go out and check your levels at anytime. Also the time that you are out sorting out your levels should then be added back on to the time you have in the exam so that you don't loose any time. This can be really helpful as it means you don't loose anytime if your levels are low so you have exactly the same amount of time that's everyone else has.

So here are a few things you need to remember when it comes to revision and exams.

1. Make sure you don't leave revision until the last moment
2. Make a revision time table
3. Take regular breaks when revising and keep checking your levels so you can correct them if they are high
4. Make sure the school have put things in place for your diabetes
5. If you start panicking in the exam concentrate on your breathing
6. Test your levels before and after exam so you can correct them if they are high or eat something if they are running a bit low
7. Try not to panic, (easier said then done I know)  you will be fine

Hopefully these points will help you through exams and revising. I know exams can be scary and you probably feel like your diabetes will get in the way and stop you achieving your best, but trust me that isn't true as long as you look after yourself as well as revising. I thought my levels would be really high in the exams which would have made it hard to concentrate and affected my grade but actually my levels were fine.

Good Luck to anyone who has been taking exams recently :)  

Exams

Being in year 11 (last year of college) at school can be really stressful. All the exams, controlled assessments, homework, revision....the list goes on and on. Its like the school think you don't have a life outside school with the amount of revision and homework they want you to do (one of the reasons why I haven't posted in a long time). You are put under so much pressure to do well in all your subjects and it really doesn't help when they cram like 3 mock exams in each day over 3 weeks, it would make so much more sense to spread the exams out more so that you actually have enough time to revise and remember all of it. Anyway luckily the real GCSE's are spread out more so that you can make sure you have enough time to revise, learn everything and do the best that you can in the exams.

I remember when I had my year 10 exams which decided if you were ready to move up into year 11. I panicked so much about them, I was silly though as I left my revision to the last moment as every time I tried to revise I would stress out which made my levels go really high. This made it really hard for me to concentrate so I ended up giving up with revision. This obviously wasn't the best thing to do as it meant I panicked while in the exams as I hadn't revised anything and I ended up doing really
rubbish.

 

I went through this cycle every time I had an exam. I am sure many other people go through something like this too so don't worry if you do, you aren't alone.  

I needed to find away of stopping this cycle happening though as with my year 11 exams I need to get good grades to be able to get into the 6th forms I want to go to so that I am able to do the courses I want. So I spoke to my psychologist about it and we came up with a few ways how to stop this cycle from happening.

Here is a list of things you should try to stop the cycle from happening:

• Start revising early, don't leave it to the last moment 
• Make a revision table so that you know what you are going to revise every day
• Revise for like an hour and then have a break as if you revise for too long it will stop going in
• Make sure you are organised and know when your exams are
• If you know your levels go high when you revise, put a temp basal on your pump while you revise or if you are on injects check your levels regularly so you can correct them    
• Try some relaxation techniques to help yourself relax

I used the stuff listed above and it really helped me, I hardly panicked in my mock exams and I feel like i have done well in most of them. If you had asked me at first before I did all of those things to help me stop the cycle I used to go through, I would have said they would have never worked and there was no point in even trying them. I am so glad I tried that list of things as it has helped me so much and now I am not working about doing me GCSE's next year as I know I can control my emotions and not panic in the exams and mess my grades up.

If you are struggling with your emotions and levels while doing revision and exams please use the list of things to help stop that from happening, it will really help. If you plan enough in advance you will do fine in your exams. Just remember to revise and follow the tips in this post. I wish everyone good luck in their mock exams if you haven't already done them :)  
 

hba1c

A hba1c is a test which works out your average level over a long period of time. This test is done by a simple finger prick just like a bloodcount test but you need a little more blood. A hba1c is normal done every time you have a hospital clinic appointment and it helps your diabetes team see how good your levels have been and how good your control of your diabetes is. If your hba1c is high the hospital will help you work out why it is high and how you can get it back down, they wont get annoyed or angry with you as they are only there to help you.

At the beginning of last year my hba1c went all the way up to 13 because I didn't have good control of my levels at all. I went through a bad patch where I decided I didn't want to be diabetic anymore so I didn't do my bloodcount and just gave myself insulin for the food I was eating. I would just make up what my bloodcount was and put it in my pump so that it looked like I was doing my levels when I wasn't. I thought no one would find out what I was doing but because I was making up what my levels were, it meant that when my levels were running really high I wasn't giving correction as I didn't know they were. so my levels just stayed high. When I was doing this I had no idea what I was actually doing to my body, my body got used to having high levels and I was making myself really ill. When I found out that my hba1c was 13 it made me realise that I really need to change and get it back down to normal.

So I set myself a goal to get my hba1c below 8, I knew it would take a lot to get it down that much but I knew I would be able to do it in the end. I didn't care how long it took me, I would do it. I started doing all the things I should have been doing like checking my levels and correcting, using temp basals to help get my levels down, changing the amount of insulin I was getting and  things like that. Every time I went to my clinic appointments I couldn't wait to see how much my hba1c had gone down. Sometimes I got a bit upset as it had gone up and I felt like it was never ever going to go below 8. However I never gave up I carried on doing everything and anything I could to get it lower.

Last week I had a hospital clinic appointment and for some reason I had a feeling that my hba1c was maybe going to be below 8 as my levels had been really good for once. After having the hba1c test done you have to wait a while to get the results s while we waited we got called by the doctor. I walked in to the room and sat down as the doctor was looking through my notes. She then looked at me and said wow, your hba1c is 7.2 (55). I honestly couldn't believe it was 7.2, that's the lowest my hba1c has ever been and I have been diabetic for over 11 years. The doctor was so impressed with me, she said that normally when someone's hba1c goes to 13 they never get it back down to 7. I was so happy I couldn't believe I had finally got it down that low :)

I realised that if I couldn't control my levels now it was going to be a lot harder then I got older and I don't want my diabetes to ruin getting good GCSE results.  I don't want my diabetes to control me and make it a lot harder to do things I want to do so I did something about it. I started looking after myself move and caring about what my levels were and what my hba1c was and that is how I got my hba1c down and back to normal.

Here are some tips to get your hba1c down:

• Set a goal for your hba1c so that you have something to work towards
• Have a reason why you want your hba1c to be lower
• Make sure you are doing all the things your hospital have told you to do
• Correct high levels
• Change the amount of insulin you are having if you are having constant lows or highs at a certain time of day
• Ask your diabetic team to help you if you are struggling or finding it hard

All of these thing will help you get your hba1c down, however don't get upset or annoyed if your hba1c goes up high because at the end of the day it is only a number. The hospital wont get annoyed with you if it is high as they are there to help you, not tell you off. As long as you are doing the best that you can that's all that matters.
If you but your mind to something you can do it, never give up.  

Hot weather

I am really sorry I haven't posted on my blog in ages, I have been so busy with school, homework, revision, applying to be a prefect, concert and other thing like that. The time has just gone so quickly and so much has happened that I think I should blog about as I now have the some free time :)

The weather can affect your levels a lot however it can effect everyone's levels differently. Some people find that when the weather gets warmer and a lot hotter it makes there levels lower and some people find that the hot weather makes their levels higher then usual. It can be really annoying if your levels tend to run lower in the hot weather as that is the time that people normal do more exercise. For example when people go on holiday the weather is normally hotter which will mean your levels will probably run higher or lower then usual which can be really annoying as when your levels are running high it can make you feel rubbish which will mean you wont be able to enjoy your holiday as much. Also if your levels are running low while you are on holiday it come also be annoying as people normal go swimming a lot and that will make your levels drop even more. It can be so annoying, I know!

Recently the weather has got a lot warm and more humid in Cambridgeshire and this has effected my levels quiet a lot. When I was younger the hot weather always used to make my levels run higher which was really annoying as it used to make my feel so ill and rubbish however over the last couple of days the weather has gotten warmer my levels have been running really low and I keep have quiet a few lows. My mum said she doesn't think it is the hot weather that is affecting my levels however I cant think of any other reason why they would be running low just when the weather got hotter. As I have notice that my levels maybe running low because of the hot weather I have been checking my levels more regularly and I have been taking more things like cans of coke, more glucose tabs to get my levels up just encase I have more lows then usual. I have also adjusted my insulin so that I am less likely to keep having all the lows I have been having recently.

Here are some of the things I found on the internet which will help managing your diabetes in the hot weather:

• Drink plenty of water to avoid dehydration. Carry a bottle of water with you
• Exercise and do more strenuous activities in the early or later hours of the day when the temperatures are cooler and the sun is not at its peak.
• Check blood sugar levels frequently, since they may fluctuate more.
• Remember, extreme temperature changes can have an effect on your diabetes supplies; insulin can break down, blood glucose meters and test strips can be damaged, and altitude can affect blood glucose meter performance. Use insulated bags protected by a cool pack to safely store your supplies, but avoid freezing.
• Make sure you have more supplies on you to up your levels encase you go low
• Adjust your insulin if you think its needs adjusting 
• Wear light colored clothing

If you are going on holiday soon make sure you remember the above points as it will really help and make managing your diabetes a bit easier. Also please don't get annoyed or upset because your levels aren't perfect while the weather is hotter or while you are on holiday as no ones levels will be and I don't want you to ruin your holiday just because your levels aren't where you want them.
Hope everyone is enjoying the hot weather and has a lovely time on holiday if you are going on holiday!  

Late Nights

Some nights it can be really hard to get to sleep because of your diabetes. Its so annoying laying  in bed for hours just looking up at the ceiling thinking why cant my levels just be in range so that I can get to sleep.  Its really annoying and frustrating, I know.

I don't know if its the same with you but when my levels are 15+ I find it really hard and impossible to sleep. I used to be able to get to sleep when my levels were high but for some reason I really struggle to now. Some night I just lay in bed for hours trying to get to sleep but no matter how hard I try or what I do I cant get to sleep due to my levels. I try reading a book (I always end up falling asleep when I read at night in bed), closing my eyes, just laying there, clearing my mind....and so many other things but nothing seems to work. I just end up just laying there thinking about so many different things. The only good thing is I do think of the weirdest of things while laying there and I normally end up remember things I had forgotten about and coming up with ideas. However the next day after I have had a night with high levels I am so tired and not in the best of moods. Its so annoying when you have school the next day because it takes so much energy to concentrate, I could so easily fall asleep in lesson lol (I don't think the teacher would be very impressed with me)

So what is the best way to deal with nights like this?
- You should check your levels every 1-2 hours to check that your levels are coming down or going up
- Try clearing your mind to help you sleep
- Try and stay relaxed and calm
- Don't worry if you cant get to sleep as you will fall asleep eventually
- Make sure you keep giving correction if your levels are high
- If your levels are running high check for ketones (if you have any ketones drink lots of water)

I know it can be really annoying when you cant sleep and everyone else in your house is asleep. The thing is there isn't really anything that we can do to stop with from happening, its just part of diabetes (annoying I know). The best thing to do is try to get your levels back in range so that you can sleep. Sometimes it can feel like you will never be able to get them back in range but I know that you can. You are stronger than you think!

Exams

Exams are stressful for everyone but with diabetes on the top of exams it can make it a lot harder and more stressful for us. Stress can make your levels really hard which makes it I lot harder to concentrate in an exams and this could effect you mark and overall grade that you get in the exam. The hospital have told me several times that if I have high levels in an exam my grade will be lower then if I had good levels, however its really hard to make sure your levels are in range while you have an exam. You don't want your levels to be too high or too low but its really hard to get them just right when you are so stressed about the exam.

The last 2 weeks I have had loads exams, the exams are for the teachers to check that you are on target and ready to move in to year 11. I found it really had to keep my levels under control these 2 weeks as on some days when I had exams my levels were running really high but then on other days when I had exams my levels were running nearly low. This has made it harder because I had to try and work out whether I needed a temp basal on when I had an exam.

On Friday last week I had 2 exams in one day, my first exam was a maths exam and my second exam was a ethics exam. On Friday morning before school my levels were running a bit high so I decided to put a temp basal on of 150% and kept checking my levels every hour so that I could give myself correction to try and get my levels down and back to normally. However every time I checked my levels they had either stayed the same or gone even higher. When I got to school I had my maths exam and throughout the who exams I was really struggling to concentrate and work out the answers, even though I had done loads of revision at home before the test I was really struggling to remember how to work out some of the answers because of my levels. When the exam had finished I knew I had done really rubbish because of my levels being high so I was worried about what grade I was going to get.

After break I had my ethics test, throughout the whole of break I was panicking because I couldn't remember any of the information I had revised for ethics so I stood their at break looking over my revision notes before the bell went. Even though I had already revised loads and I was reading over my notes, none of it was going into my head as I felt so ill and couldn't concentrate because of my levels. When I heard the bell go I was panicking so much as it meant the ethics exam was minutes away and I couldn't remember anything, I was going to fail! As I walked into the exam hall I saw that my ethics teacher was standing at the front of the hall so I walked over to her and told her that my levels were running really high and I was really struggling to concentrate and remember the stuff I had revised. I told her that I would try my best at the exam but I probably wouldn't do very well. My teacher said that I didn't look very well and that she didn't want me to do the test as it would be a lot better if I went back to lesson and did the exam another time then having to sit there feeling rubbish and then having to retake the exam because of my grade. So I went to go to the lesson I was meant to be in and then realised that I was meant to be in my ethics lesson with the teacher, so I had to go back and ask her what she wanted me to do as I wasn't meant to be in her lesson. She told me that I could sit and do some move ethics revision and relax in her classroom while she marked some peoples exams. I am so glad I didn't end up doing the ethics exam as I would have done really rubbish and I am so glad I have a really nice teacher who is really understanding and caring.

However my levels aren't always really high when it comes to exams. This Wednesday I had no exams but my levels were running really high so I put a temp basal on of 150% and was checking my levels every hour so that I could make sure they weren't going any high and so that I could keep giving myself corrections to bring my levels down. My levels wouldn't go down even though I was having 50% more insulin then I normally do and I had had loads of corrections. Then on Thursday I woke up with low levels, so I took the temp basal off. I had a English exam and a French exam, so I made sure I checked my levels before the exam encase they were high or low. Before my English exams my levels were 5.6 which was a surprise as I thought they were going to be a lot higher as I was really stressed about the exam. When I can out of the exam I made sure I checked my levels again just encase I needed to give myself a correction or I needed to eat something, when I tested they were 4.0 so I had something to eat. My levels were running in the 5s when I did my French exam which was good.

As you can see exams can make your really high or nearly low so make sure you check your levels before and after an exam and let someone know if your levels are going to affect the grade you will get. Also make sure the people running the exam know that you are diabetic as you might have to go out of the exam if you start to feel like your levels are high or low and need to test. In all of my exams the school has sat me near the door of the exam hall so that I can put my hand up and go out of the exam at anytime to test my levels without distracting other people who are doing the test. Always remember that your health is a lot more important then the exam, so make if you feel like you need to test your levels you tell someone and then go out of the exam hall and test.
Good luck to everyone who has exams coming up!  

Illness and levels

Sorry I haven't written on my blog in a while, I have been busy because of work experience and then I was ill this week. This gave me the idea of writing a post about how being ill can effect your levels. Illnesses and infections as well as stress will make your levels go high because as part of the body's defence mechanism for fighting illness and infection causes more glucose to be released into the bloodstream and prevents insulin from working properly. This happens even if you are off your food or eating less than usual.

Last weekend after I had just finished my work experience my levels started running high and I couldn't work out why. I thought it might be because a had a bit of a cold or that I was upset about leaving the work experience because I was going to miss the children and babies.

On Monday norming I woke up at 1am and I could hardly open my left eye because it was all gooey so I showed my mum and she said it was probably conjunctivitis so I cleaned my eye up and went back to sleep. I didn't sleep well though because I kept waking up in the night because of my eye. I woke up at 1am, 2am, 4am, 5am and 7am so in the morning I was really tired and felt rubbish so I didn't go to school or do my paper round. In the morning my mum rang the doctors and said that she couldn't drive me to the doctors because of the operation she had on her back and then she explained to them that my eye was really gooey, bloodshot and sore and my levels had been running high. They said that we could buy some eye drops at the chemists. So my stepdad brought them on the way home from work for me. I started using the eye drop on Monday but my levels where still running really high because of the conjunctivitis in my left eye.

On Tuesday morning I woke up in the morning and I could hardly open my right eye as the conjunctivitis had spread to my right eye as well as my left eye. So I went and did my paper round and then came home and told my mum that the conjunctivitis was in my right eye as well as my left eye. So my mum put the eye drops in both of my eyes and said I was alright to go to school. While I was at school my eyes started to really hurt in science so I closed my eye for a bit as it made them feel better, I nearly fell asleep though. Then at lunch I took some paracetamol as my right cheek started to hurt and I felt so rubbish so thought it might make me feel better. Everyone of my teacher kept asking if I was alright because my eyes were so swollen and bloodshot they thought I had been crying when actually it was just because of my conjunctivitis.

On Wednesday morning I woke and went on my paper round. When I got home I didn't have school as the school was on strike for the day so I just sat down and relaxed for a while. I then started doing some of my patchwork blanket because it is the last thing I need to do to complete my Duke Of Edinburgh bronze award so I thought I would get some of it done. My right cheek started to hurt again but it hurt more then yesterday so I told my mum and she said to take some paracetamol because that should help, I also checked my levels and they were really high so I thought I would put a temp basal on off 170% to try and get my levels back down. I then went to sleep for a pic so that I wasn't in pain anymore and when I woke up my right cheek still hurt so I told my mum again, she said my cheek was really red, swollen and hot. So I checked my level again and they were still over 15 so something wasn't right as I was having 70% extra insulin and my levels were still really high. My mum called the doctors and explain what had happened with my eye and my cheek and that my levels were still running high even when I was having loads of extra insulin, The doctors said that it was classed as an emergency appointment because of my diabetes so they fitted me in an appointment at the end of  the day. So my step dad took me to the appointment when he got home from work as my mum couldn't drive there. The doctor said I had conjunctivitis and sinusitis which was why my right cheek had been hurting so much so they gave me some antibiotics to help with the conjunctivitis and sinusitis, they also said that my levels were running so high because of the infections I had and that I needed to keep the 170% temp basal on and keep checking my levels to check what they were. My mum told me that I should tell the paper round lady that I wasn't able to do paper round on Thursday morning as I wasn't well enough to do it and she told me that I wasn't going to be going to school on Thursday either as she wanted me to rest so that I would feel better on Friday.

On Thursday morning (today) I woke up feeling a little bit better. So I had some paracetamol, my antibiotics and my eye drops and relaxed for a bit as I didn't want to over do it and make myself feel more unwell. At lunch time when I did my levels they were 9.1 which is the best they have been in ages and I didn't even have a temp basal on. At dinner my levels went up to 23.3 and I started to feel ill again, my right cheek started to hurt again and my levels weren't helping at all. I gave myself a correction and then put a temp basal of 150% on to try and get my levels down again.

When you have an illness or an infection your levels will go high and it can be really annoying as it can make you feel worse. The best thing to do is not to panic because if you panic that will make your levels go higher, so if you have any questions or you are unsure on what to do stay calm and contact your diabetes team because they will able to help you. You should test your levels more often, like every 1-2 hours so that you can make sure your levels aren't gong higher or dropping too quickly. Try and stay well hydrated, so have a bottle of water with you because high levels can make you really dehydrated. You should test for ketones if your levels are running high, if you have ketones and you aren't really sure what to do, don't panic, just contact your diabetes team can give you some advice on what to do.
I know it can be really annoying when your levels are high because you are ill and you aren't doing anything wrong to make them high but just remember you will get through it because you are stronger than you think

Work experience

At my school when you are in year 10 you go on work experience for 2 weeks, everyone get to decide where you want to work for the 2 weeks. You could work in a primary school, preschool, shop, hairdressers, building site....there are so many places you could go. I was really excited about choosing somewhere to go but at the same time I was worried about how my diabetes might get in the way and make it harder.

I decided I really wanted to work with children on work experience but I wasn't quite sure what type of job I would prefer to do. I talked to my mum about it as she works in a preschool so I thought she might know some places which would be happy for me to do my work experience at. She said about a daycare place near to wear I live who look after babies and toddlers. I went there for an interview to see what the daycare was like, what the staff were like and to have a tour of the daycare. After the interview I was so excited about starting work however I was a bit worried what my levels were going to be like as I am not used to being active all day an working long hours.

On the first day of my work experience I was really worried as I didn't know any of the children there or any of the staff, so my levels were running in the morning because I was so worried and nervous about starting. Luckily by lunch my levels had gone back to normal which made me feel better. I was worried at first that I might need to do my levels while I was meant to be looking after the kids but the staff were really good and told me that if I needed to check my levels or I didn't feel well and needed to sit down for a bit all I had to do was tell one of the staff and then I could go to the office and sit down for a bit and sort myself out.

I realised that I never needed to worry about my diabetes as they were really understanding and my levels weren't effected that much by working longer and being more active however I was really tired and kept having to go to bed early haha. I have now been on work experience for one week and I am really enjoying it and it has made me realise that my diabetes doesn't stop me being like everyone else at work. Always remember your diabetes doesn't have to stop you from doing anything, you are stronger than you think.

Reality Check

This time last year I went through a stage where I wished I didn't have diabetes. I wished I didn't have to test my levels or give insulin before I ate, have a pump attached to me 24/7, have hospital appointments, worry about my levels and hba1c count. I just wanted to be like I used to be before I got diagnosed with diabetes. I just wanted to be normal! 

I ended up being admitted onto a ward at the hospital because I stopped testing my levels and I was just putting a random number as my levels into my pump and then being the amount of carbs I was eating. However this made my levels really high because I wasn't correcting my levels when they were high because I was guessing what my levels were. When I was admitted in to hospital the nurses were checking that I was checking my levels and doing everything that I was supposed to be doing. They were checking my levels every 2 hours so that they could monitor them.

While I was in hospital I was on a ward which mostly had children who had cancer on. I was in a room with this little girl in the bed next to me who had cancer, the girl had been in hospital for 5 months. She was so ill and was crying all the time because she was in pain, it must have been so hard for her parents having to be with their daughter and see her in so much pain and there was nothing they could do to help her. It was sad knowing that she had been in hospital so long and that she was so ill, all she wanted to do was be at home and not be ill or in pain.

I have never had the courage to tell anyone this before or been able to admit this to anyone before so it is quiet a big thing for me to write this on my blog and it has taken a long time to write.
The reason I got back on track with my diabetes and am where I am today is because being in hospital and seeing some really ill children my age and younger with cancer made me realise that having diabetes isn't actually that bad, it could be a lot worse. If I looked after myself I would never had ended up in hospital whereas all of these children were in hospital and it wasn't there fault, they didn't really have a choose about being in hospital but I did. It made me want to look after myself, get a better hba1c, try and get better levels because I could make these changes and then not end up in hospital. It still really upsets me thinking of that little girl and all of the other children who I saw on the ward with cancer, it was bit of a reality check for me and made me realise that if I look after myself diabetes wont control me and I can still have a normal life whereas there are some people that cant because they are really ill and have to stay in hospital loads.

I know I shouldn't have stopped checking my levels in the first place but at the time it felt like the right thing to do because I just wanted to be normal but I am so glad I have now realised that having diabetes isn't that bad if you look after yourself. Always remember you are stronger than you think!

Friends at school

We all have days where are levels are running really high or really low, and we have no idea why. It can be really hard when you have days like this at school because it can make it really difficult to concentrate and learn things when your levels are all over the place. It can be really annoying when you just want to get on with your work and be like other people in your class, and then you start to feel unwell. So you ask the teacher if you can check your levels which mean the whole of your class find and it stands out that you have diabetes (I hate when this happens).
The school gave me a card called an 'exit card'; I can show this card to any of my teacher at any point in the lesson and it means I can leave the lesson without telling the teacher why or where I am going. This means the rest of my class don't know why I am leaving the lesson and they don't even see the card when I show it to the teacher, they think I have just gone to get a drink or gone to the toilet when actually I am soring my diabetes out. Its made it so much easier to look after my diabetes at school.
 
So yesterday at school I checked my levels in form because I wasn't felling that well. My levels were 20.4 which didn't make sense because my levels were 12.7 before I had breakfast which was an hour ago, so I had no idea what was happening with my levels. I gave myself a correction and then I put a temp basal of 150% on my pump so that my levels would come down. I then went to my next lesson which was Core RE, I didn't really have to do I lot in that lesson so that was ok. All I had to do was write down some information from this sheet of paper, I did find it really hard to concentrate. At the end of my Core RE lesson I thought I would check my levels as I was feeling worse then I did when I was in Form. When I was checking my levels my friend saw I was checking my levels so asked what they were, I told her they were 26.0, I couldn't believe that my levels had gone up instead of down even though I had given myself so much more extra insulin.

My friend kept telling me that I need to go do some exercise like doing lap round the school to get my levels down. The thing is I really just wanted to sit down and wait for my levels to go down because I didn't feel well. My friend was really worried about me so she walked to my next lesson, science, with me. I told her I was fine and that my insulin would start working soon so my levels would go down.  My friend said no I am telling your science teacher. I said its ok, I will be fine, don't worry. My friend didn't listen to me, she went up to the teacher and told her that my levels were 26.0 and that I needed to do some laps of the school to get my levels down. At first the teacher had no idea what my friend was talking about and then she realised. My teacher asked to talk to me so I went over and spoke to her. She said I needed to do some exercise. So I told her that I had given myself some insulin and all I needed to do was sit down because I wasn't feeling well.

Throughout the whole of my science lesson my teacher keep checking on me, to see that I was feeling ok and that my levels had came down. The good thing was she did it without the whole class knowing what she was doing. Luckily by lunch my levels had gone back to normally and I was feeling a lot better, however by 8pm I was really tired and ended up falling asleep, which isn't normal for me as I normally go to bed at 10pm.

At the time when my friend told my science teacher about my levels I wasn't very happy with her, however after my science lesson I totally understand why she told her, and I am quiet glad she told my teacher as I wasn't able to concentrate in science as my levels were so high and I didn't do as well as I could have in my science test.

It is really good to have friend that look after you at school, I know it can sometimes feel like they are telling you what to do but its only because they care about you and don't want you to be ill. Sometimes you need someone to help you with your diabetes and your friends are really good at that.
Always remember you are stronger then you think.

Pressure

Having diabetes can be really stressful and emotional at times, you can sometimes feel like there is a lot of pressure on you.  Trying to achieve perfect numbers, carb count accurately so your levels don't go high or low, trying to get the right balance of insulin to food, trying to not over treat low levels or high levels, trying to keep your levels perfect when your ill, excited or sad, trying to get a perfect hba1c. No mater how much your try, it can sometimes feel like you are going backwards with your diabetes instead of forward. It can be really hard at times but don't worry you're not the only person who feels like this, everyone goes through a stage like this.

As you can probably tell from my last post my levels have been running really high because I have been ill, my cannula feel out in the night, I've had ketones and some other things. I have been trying everything to get my levels down and back to normal but nothing really seems to be working, I have tried using temp basals, corrections and it seems to work for a while but then my levels go high again, its been so annoying.

I have a hospital appointment on the 9th January (Thursday) and I have been really worried and scared about going. I really don't want to have my hba1c done because I had worked so hard to so hard to get my hba1c down to 8.1 (it used to be 11.4)and now this happens. My hba1c is probably going to be really high again. I did think about asking the hospital not to do my hba1c as I have had a bad patch with isn't my fault and I have been doing everything I can to try and sort my levels out but it hasn't really been working.

After talking to some people I realised that at the end of the day you cant always have perfect levels, perfect hba1c, its just not possible. We are human and we cant be perfect at everything. Its not our fault if we have a stage where are levels aren't perfect as long as your try you best and get your levels back on track it doesn't matter. Always remember you are stronger then you think you are, you will get through times like this I promise

High levels and Ketones

We all have those bad days were your levels are running really high or really low, the days were you forget to give yourself insulin at one of your meals, the night where your cannula to your pump falls out in the night and you don't realise, the time were you cant find you meter to test your bloods, the day where you over treat your low bloods by accident, don't worry we all do these things sometimes. Its can be so annoying because if you forget to do one of these things or something happens that's not your fault for example your cannula falling out and you don't realise because it can make you feel really ill and sick.

On Thursday my cannula fell out in the night and I didn't realise, this meant I hadn't been getting any insulin throughout the night. I woke up at 6am feeling really thirsty and sick, so I went down stairs and got a drink and when I got back in bed I realised that my cannula wasn't in my leg anymore. I tested my levels straight away and they were 25.0 so I tested my ketones and they were 2.8. The next thing I did was put a new cannula in me, put a temp basal of 150% on and put a correction in my pump too. I felt so ill so I just laid back in bed and I fell asleep, I kept waking up and checking my level and when the next thing I knew I was asleep again.

By lunch time my levels were 5.1 and my ketones were 0.0, I was feeling a bit better too. I took my temp basal off so that my levels didn't go low. I thought I had gotten rid off all of my ketones for that day but that wasn't the case :(  At dinner when I did my levels they were running a bit high so I check my levels and I had some ketones but not a lot. I but on another temp basal of 150% on so that I could get my levels back to normal. When I tested my levels and ketones an hour later they had gone up instead of down. So I changed my cannula again (for the second time that day which was really annoying) and I gave myself another correction and laid down because I felt really ill again. I tested my levels an hour later and my levels were HI (33,3+) and my ketones were 2.2.

My mum said to me if levels and ketones didn't start to come down in the next hour then i would have to go to a&e because I probably had DKA. I was sitting in the living room on the sofa so scared I really didn't want to end up in hospital. The last time I got admitted into hospital with DKA they had to put two drips in my arm and hand and I nearly fainted and they had to give me gas and air because I have a bit of a needle phobia. I really didn't want to end up in hospital  for like 3 days and have to have two drips in my arm. I really cant explain to you the feelings that were going through me head I was so scared, it was like the longest hour ever to have to wait. Luckily when I tested my levels and ketones an hour later they had lowered, I was so happy I told my mum and she said she didn't have to take me to the hospital anymore (:

I know at times it can be really scary to have diabetes but I have learnt that you shouldn't jump to conclusions. I got all worked up and upset over something that never ever happened, we need to try and stay calm in situations like this. I know it can be really hard but always remember you are stronger then you think (:

Fears

Everyone is scared of different things, it could be something really scary to you but to someone else its nothing. Some people try and face their fears but it's not as easy as it sounds, it can be really hard. Some people don't tell anyone their fears because they are scared someone might think it's funny or that someone might use their fear against them. I never really tell anyone about my phobias or fears because I think some of them are weird, I thought today I would tell you about one of my fears.

One of my biggest fears are needles, I have a phobia of them. I don't really tell people about this phobia because I have to stick needles in me every day so I thought people might find it a bit stupid. this is the first time I have told lots of people about my big fear/phobia of needles. I have no idea why I am so scared of needles but I just am.

As I am on a pump I have to change my line every 3 days. When I change my line I use this spray that numbs your skin, this means that when I insert my new cannula in me I don't feel it go in. However even though I use this spray I am still scared of changing my line. It normally takes me like 10 minutes to change my cannula because when I go to insert the cannula I get scared and don't want to do it. So I leave it a bit longer and then I will try and insert my cannula again. Once I insert my new cannula I am so happy that I have done it.

The thing that I am most scared on is blood test. Every time I have a blood test I have to lay down and I get really worked up about it, so my levels ended up going high. Every year I have an annual review at the diabetic clinic where they do a blood test,. I had mine a couple of weeks ago, I was fine until they said I had to have my blood test done. To start of I wouldn't go into the room where they were doing the blood tests because I really didn't want to have it done. One of the nurses came out and walked me into the room. When I got in the room I sat on the bed and they choose which arm they were going to do the blood test on. I was shaky loads because I was so scared. When they went to take the blood I start crying because I really didn't want to have it done. So one of the nurses came and hugged me and made sure I wasn't looking while the other nurse took the blood from my arm. It hurt a bit when the nurse took the blood but it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I was so proud of myself after it was all done.

I have realised that thing aren't always as bad as you think it's going to be. you are a lot stronger then you think you are. You can face your fears and phobias if you really want to, I know it is really scary at first but you will be so proud of yourself after you have faced your fears.

Symptoms

Recently my levels have been going low just before I go to bed and then when I wake up the next morning my levels have been running a bit high. This gave me the idea of writing a post about the symptoms of high and low levels and what causes your levels to go low or high. When your levels go high or low it makes you feel unwell and it can also wear you out for the rest of the day.

When my levels are low I feel really shaky, find it really hard to concentrate and my skin goes pale but everyone has different symptoms when their levels are low. The most common symptoms of low levels are feeling sweaty, feeling shaky, feeling hungry, tiredness, blurred vision, lack of concentration, headaches, feeling tearful, stroppy or moody or going pale. Everyone gets different symptoms because everyone’s bodies are different so we all react in different ways when our levels are low.  Your levels can go low because you have had too much insulin, you have missed a meal, you have done a lot of physical activity or other reasons. However sometimes there is no obvious cause of your levels going low. Sometimes people worry that their levels will go low in the night and they won’t wake up and realise; I worry about this a lot too. The hospital told me that I will only wake up in the night if I am having a bad low because my symptoms would wake me up, so if my levels weren’t very low then I wouldn’t wake up because I don’t need to. I don’t worry as much about it now after what the hospital have told me.  

When my levels are high I get stomach pains, headaches and I get really thirsty. Everyone gets different symptoms when their levels are high. Your levels can go high because you may have missed an insulin dose, not given enough insulin, been snacking on food, over-treating a hypo, stressed about something or being unwell with an infection. When your levels have been running high this can make you feel really tired and wear you out for the rest of the day.  

Sometimes it can be hard to work out what symptoms you get when your levels are high or low. Having low or high levels can make you feel really rubbish and unwell but you will be able to get through it, I know you will.  You are stronger then you think you are.

Where i am today

Through the last 8 months I have changed so much and I have  became more independent. At the beginning of the year I decided I didn't want to have diabetes anymore and I made myself really ill. My hba1c went up to 13.1. However now I am proud to have diabetes and I have looked after myself more and now my hba1c is 8.7! I have made a massive step forward in the last 8 months and the hospital and my mum are so proud of me.

A few months ago I started seeing a psychologists at the hospital to help me with my diabetes as I was going through a really hard time. While I was talking to the psychologist she explained to me how having consistently high levels, it makes you feel ill, makes it harder to concentrate at school and it makes your hair and nails grow slower. This made me think about my GCSE exams in year 11, if my levels were running high all the time it would make it harder for me to concentrate which would mean I wouldn't  Hey very goo GCSE results. I really want to get good GCSE results because I want to get the job I would like when I am older. I also realised  that I am going to have diabetes for the rest of my life, so if I try and get my levels and diabetes under control now it would make my life easier when I am older.

The next step was getting my Hba1c down. If my hba1c was lower this would mean my levels would be lower because a hba1c is your average blood count level. So I started to check my blood count more and when my levels were high I used to think that my levels would just go lower but it never worked so I started giving myself a correction instead. This helped bring my hba1c down because my levels are lower then they used to be. This made me feel generally happier and it made me feel well again. Also I wasn't having as much time off school anymore because I didn't feel ill anymore, this meant I was more like my friends at school and me having diabetes didn't stand out as much as it used to. I was more independent.

Then I started my own blog. I thought if I shared some of my experiences with other people it would help other people understand what people who have diabetes go through everyday. Also I hoped it would help people with diabetes to show them that they aren't alone, there are other people going though the same stuff they are. There are always people to talk to and  help them alone the way.

I have changed so much and I have achieved so much too. I am a happier, more independent person. I can't believe how much I have achieved. However I would not have been able to achieve any of these things if it wasn't for my mum, friends, the hospital and people on the Facebook groups, I would like to say thank you to everyone who has helped me and supported me along the way. I wouldn't be where I am today without you.

Stress

Your emotions have a massive effect on your diabetes. When you are feeling worried, stressed, depressed or excited about something this can make you levels high. I also find that if I have fallen out with my friend, had a disagreement with someone, had a test at school or had relationship problems, this causes my levels to be high. When my levels become high I get really stressed over stupid things and I also get annoyed with people more easily, generally it makes me feel unhappy and unwell when my levels are high.

Last year in August, I was getting ready to go on holiday to America for 18 days. While we were in America we were going to go to California, Hollywood, Disneyworld, Las Vegas, LA and more places. I was so excited about going, I couldn't wait! The only thing that was worrying me was going to the airport with all of diabetic supplies and being allowed to take it all with us on the plane. My mum had got a letter from the hospital saying that I was allowed to take it all on the plane with me but I was still worried about that. At the same time I was really excited because I had never been to America before. They let us take all of my diabetic supplies on the plane which made me feel happier. When we were sitting on the plane I thought I would do my blood count before we took off. My levels were running high so I gave myself some insulin. My levels were high because I was so excited that I was going to America for the first time.

Also when I was in year 9 we had loads of tests that were coming up, so I was really stressed about it. I knew my levels were going to be really high and that it would affect how well I did in the tests because when my levels are high I struggle to concentrate, all I want to do is lay down and do nothing. The thing was I needed to do well in these test because the results we got on the tests were going to be our end of year grades. So the morning before the tests I put a temp basal of 120% on my pump and my levels weren't high throughout the tests and I got really good grades too!!

When your levels are running high your blood is a lot thicker because there is a lot of sugar in it. This means that your body uses more energy to makes your blood pump around your body. The more energy your body uses the harder it is for you to concentrate and it makes you feel unwell. Also it's not good for you if your levels are always high because your blood needs to be able to pump around your body easily so that the blood can get to every limb in your body. So if your levels are running high or you know why are going to run high because you have a test or something like that please give yourself insulin. If you are on a pump set up a temp basal so that you are getting more insulin every hour.

Everyone's emotions make their diabetes a lot harder to control but you are stronger than you think and you will get through times like this I promise.